December 2, 2015

The days before Christmas:

The days before Christmas in my house I sat
The wife and kids left me, I was a drunken mess


No money I have, no food could I steal

My meth lab broken, my bail unreal


Out the window I saw that bunch next door

New boat and cars, oh how me they ignored


Patting my gun, hell those weirdos I’ll fix

I’ll take all their money; I’ll rob them for kicks


Out the back door I went low cross the lawn

Crawling under that boat, I was moving along


Busting through their door we were all quite surprised

They were green aliens with huge fiery red eyes


The little ones started smiling with yellow toothy grins

Oh my God, what have I went and got myself in

My scream was heard way down the block
No I begged, as they through me into their crock-pot

17 comments:

Lynn said...

Yikes! And I can see the whole thing. Good one, Ellis. :)

desk49 said...

Lynn:
supper thanks you know I like to make up a song or something like this for Christmas.

Yolanda Renee said...

Now that's a unique holiday tale! Love it!

desk49 said...

Yolanda:
Not sure it would meet the guide lines.
Thanks

Snaggle Tooth said...

Mmmm yummy!

You should always offer them Xmas cookies!
We have certainly eaten enough this week...

desk49 said...

Snaggle:
Slowey cooked
just right you see
now for weeks they
can eat parts of me

***

Thanks for dropping by.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

So the aliens had you for Christmas dinner? That is just rude! Thanks for visiting my own blog and writing such a fine poem. :-)

desk49 said...

Roland:
The thanks goes
both ways
both to the
left and right
like you say
thanks for
coming to
my sight

Nilanjana Bose said...

Oh dear, being made into Christmas dinner for aliens? Not my idea of a party. Fun poem! :)

desk49 said...

Nilanjana:
one sometimes must throw out the old for the new.

frigginloon said...

OMG, I loved every line. Hilarious.

desk49 said...

Frigginloon:
You dropped by
many many thanks

Snaggle Tooth said...

I bet you were tasty...
Wow, what a Christmas story!

desk49 said...

Snaggle:
Tasty now that I'd not take any bets on.

Elephant's Child said...

Just deserts. Or do I mean desserts.
Smiling broadly - and thank you.

Denise Covey said...

Eek! Quite the Christmas cheer, desk49! Clever, clever poem as always!

Denise :-)

desk49 said...

Elephant's:
A pickle a stew
both I was in.
Thanks for dropping by

Denise:
A warped Christmas tale so another on top I did write.
Thanks